house

This is what someone said of last weeks episode of house:

Watching this show hits a little close to home sometimes. I hate that when I can't find my own happiness, I am exactly who House is. While intellectually sound and reasonable, I become selfish, manipulative, immature, arrogant, preoccupied and unreliable. Worst than these things, I avoid reality and relationships that require I give.

All i have to say is WORD!

TBR physics

Did the sound chapter and scored 84%. Good job. Of course, i started feeling 'crazy' and i had a headache so i left the library. Wierd thing is i went to the the shop near the african market, ended up sitting there and chatting and i ate some meat pie and also brought some home. I felt better while i was in the shop. The devil sees success up my way and is trying to keep me from studying. I couldn't even review the answers properly.
Anyway, i'm glad i've kept a chart of my scores because i see the reds disappering and i'm seeing more greens. Why did i do physics yesterday and today? it's hard to make myself get into physics and usually when i get in, i'm really in. Chemistrilly speaking, studying physics is an exothermic process that requires high activation energy. Once the reaction starts, it proceeds on it's own.

I'm going to do bio 6 cuz i feel like reading but i'll hit light and fluids tomorrow. Part of me wants to call and tell them to cancel me. The other part would rather work. I think i'll work.

making judgements

So, a coworker whose worse than a GUNNER (in terms of behavior) tells me i'm going to page this doctor now. She was all hyped up and stuff after i told her the guy said to call if the patient wants benadryl because they weren't going to put in a prn order. anyway, she goes on making a big deal to the orientee about how stupid it is and all that. (Sometimes, i look at some nurses and just laugh in my head. I'm not sure how this girl thought her years as an LPN and whatever many months she spent at community college getting her associates equates to 4 years of med school and 4 years of resdiency)

Anyway, she calls the general team and they tell her to call the person covering. So i see the doc walking towards us and i said that's him coming. She turns and immediately turns towards the walk and go "oooo he's good looking." I thought, what happened to "i'm going to bug this person all day till he writes that benadryl order."

Anyway, i walk away,and when i walk back, i think the orientee realized i didn't tell them the patient was diabetic (ommission on my part but it's on the kardex and it's also in the emar so before she admister her meds, she'll realize that she needs a fingerstick). Anyway, in an effort to explain my oversight to her orientee, she tells her the fact that english isn't my first language impairs my ...... do i need to say more. I just like how some Americans judge intelligence by whether english is your first language or not. A friend in college once said to me "i can imagine how hard it must be for you learning this stuff because english isn't your first language so i can't imagine you translating this first into your language and trying to understand what it means." She always used to tell me let me help you study, let me help you study. Well, She was angry with me after graduation, didn't care till last year when she told me why she was angry. According to her, i made everyone think i was struggling when in fact i was making straight As. First of all, i have a policy of not telling people my grades because i think it's none of their business. Second, i worked all the time in college and i thought me complaining about not having time to study was the reason why she kept saying let me help you study. I mean that evening when she said she couldn't imaging how hard it is for me studying the stuff, i smiled at her and brushed it off as an ignorant remark. So i told her the fact that i didn't tell her my grades doesn't me she has to think of me as a stupid person.
I actually liked how i walked away with all those awards from school and wasn't on anyones radar. An American see you answering all the questions in class and still think you're stupid and struggling because english isn't your first language. An african sees me sitting quietly in class and even without saying a word, they call me a 'shark'. Of course, Jill is one american who looked at me sitting quietly in biochem when Dr R said the highest score was a 100 and she turned to me and said "i bet you had that 100". Again, i looked at her and smiled.

I don't mind when someone thinks i'm stupid. In fact it's easier for me because people who see the real me feel intimidated.

random babble

Speaking of CBT money, I think i may have used that to talk to someone in ghana. I just realized the amount of money i've spent talking to this person is more than i needed for that juicy couture sunglasses i wanted or even the Dsquared ones so i'm gonna have to cut those calls. In reality, i don't think i've spent that money to talk to that person. The money i've spent is unnecessary expense i've incurred.

What set reality in is the email i got from my sister. March 5th was the response date so i guess it's been a while. Anyway, i've decided to focus on real life. My life is complicated and i'm starting to feel like i cope by acting like an ostrich with it's head in the sand. I need to get my head straight. The question is can i face reality?!

CBT money.

Since i got TBR CBTs for free, i decided to move the money out of my checking. Lest it sits there and i spend it. Was going to add all of it to my emergency fund but i decided to split it 50-50 between that and AMCAS. My original plan was to mail in my check first week of march once i got the money and then when i realized it was TPW, i decided to wait till next monday. In the chance that i win, i'd pocket the money and if i didn't win, i'd send it in then in time for me to have access by april. God was gracious to me and answered my bathroom prayer in advance.

To God be the Glory

The difference

Last year, i had a hard time doing the acid base and buffers/titrations chapter in gen chem. in fact i did soo poorly that this year, i dreaded doing those 2 chapters. i did the acid and bases and did good so i remembered i had even worse problems with the buffers chapter.

Suprisingly, i did better in the titrations chapter this year. i got a perfect score,and the remaining questions i got wrong were either wrongful calculations, writing down a different answer than i'd intended and illogical reasoning such as knowing very well that the passage states something about the question and yet failing to select that as an answer or not translating stuff (data) from the passage right. Errors in deductive reasoning were also evident especially for answers i've no evidence for. Overall, i do have an actual understanding of the material. And for silly mistakes, i do try to see what i did wrong. I tried to go through my chemistry textbook but i think TBR covers the material in more detail and better.

Overall, i've realized i have an understanding of the stuff i read and i thank God for that. Maybe he's using myreadinglab to help with my comprehension overall.

Anyway, i'm still excited about TBR CBTs i got yesterday. I just can't stop saying "Thank you God." It really was a nice thing to wake up to after that crazy night at work. To God be the all the glory now and the glory that's coming.

O my dear sweet Jesus!

OMG! OMG!!OMG!!!! I'm overwhelmed and at a loss for words!!!! Thank you Jesus

I had to post this as my current facebook status after seeing that i got TBR CBTs free even before TPW is over. Oh, it's not the 7 CBTs that costs $200. It's the 9 that you get from the course. Yesterday, i my facebook status was "Please Lord, let me win again in this years TPW drawings and i promise to claim my prize on time. Amen"

Talk about God exceeding my expectations. I can't just just stop saying oh my God. I'm soo excited i'm really at a loss for words. I had a little tear come up in my eyes.

I'd like to say a big thank you to BerkReviewTeach on SDN. And by the sweet grace of God i'm rocking this exam in a way no one has ever done.